Club Together / July 2015: Growing Up

What Advice Would You Give To Your Younger Self?

Growing up means making mistakes and learning from them, of course, but are there any nuggets of wisdom you wish your past-self had been privy to? We asked our writers and the Twittersphere what advice they would have given themselves if they could go back in time and meet their younger selves.

Personally, I would tell myself the big old cliche that things really do get better. Being an adult (or being regarded as one, at least) means you have the freedom to do the things you want to do and only you can decide whether or not they’re working for you. I would dare myself to speak up a little bit more, as filtering my speech only means blurring into the background (and plenty of awkward encounters in the street where people recognise you, but don’t acknowledge you because you’re the weird girl who never talks).
I would tell myself to go into university from day one and give people a chance. It sucks that I discovered myself so late, I’m sure I would have been appreciated and liked a few years ago if I’d let go of all my social anxieties and inhibitions. Perhaps most importantly, however, I’d ask myself to grow some balls. I put up with a lot of bullshit from a lot of people, and now I wish I would have told them all to bugger off! (I’d also tell myself to go to the dentist more so that I didn’t end up with painfully sensitive teeth…)

– Keff (@Katherinehoc)
London/Sheffield
Keffnote – The Public Diary

 

The piece of advice that I would give my younger self would be to talk more. I would tell myself that bottling every emotion up is not needed, and it is not healthy. I would tell myself that talking to someone about what was going on with me wouldn’t mean I was weak, broken, or needy. I would tell her that she is important enough and deserves help.

I would tell my younger self that talking and expressing my emotions before they became overwhelming will become a vital part of her self care as she got older. I would tell her to take up blogging a bit sooner, because that’s the one outlet that has seemed to help the most in terms of expression. I would tell my younger self that it’s okay to talk and be emotional, and that there is nothing wrong with her. I would tell her that much of her strength lies in her voice.

 

– Kayla Hutchinson (@lunafayebeauty)
Tennessee
Luna Fay Beauty

 

Pull your face away from that tiny window into the internet and look up at the faces of those who love you. Put your phone away when you’re with friends and family. Put your phone on silent – you don’t need to feel a vibration in your pocket every time someone likes your photo on Instagram. You should focus on feeling the vibration in your heart when your jokes make people bust up laughing, or when your cooking impresses your Grandmother, or when your dog wants to lick your face.

Enjoy the time you have with your friends and family, because you will miss them, and there will be moments where you won’t have those faces to look at, and homesickness will hit you hard. Walk your dog and take her to the park for fun, because you’re going to miss her wet, slobbery kisses. Bake cookies with your Grandmother because you’re going to miss her and her cookies. But most of all, appreciate it while it lasts. Because, as the great Ferris Bueller once said: “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”

 

– Morgan Stinson (@theflamedame)
San Diego
The Flame Dame

 

Throw yourself feet first into adventure, don’t waste your weekends sitting at home waiting for fun to find you. Get out there: travel, make friends, explore and take so many pictures whilst you’re having fun. Looking back on your pictures and memories make for the best stories and I believe inspiration is the best legacy you can pass on.

 

– Rebekah Hughes (@rebekahesme)
Yorkshire
Rebekah Esme

If I could go back in time and talk to my younger self I would tell her that the things that seem huge now really aren’t worth stressing over – that boy who she thinks is the one? Give it a month or two and she probably won’t even  remember his name! The exams she’s stressing out over? Relax, she’s only young, she should be having fun. She can always resit if she has to, but ultimately, if she goes to college, no one after that will care about her GCSE  results.

I would tell her to give her parents a break. They aren’t setting rules just to inconvenience her, they are doing it because they care about her and want the best for her. I would tell her she will understand this in time, but she probably won’t believe me! I would tell her, above all else, to follow her gut instincts – if something feels wrong for her, that’s because it probably is, and she needs to learn to listen to her inner voice sooner rather than later.

 

– Debbie (@randommusings29)
North East England
Random Musings

There will be points in your adult life where you will think that you can’t get through it. You can; you are stronger than you think. If something doesn’t feel right then it usually isn’t, trust your gut and stand up for yourself. Don’t let anyone treat you badly because you deserve to be treated with respect and there are people out there who will show you that.
You are going to be a fantastic mum who will do anything for her children, but make sure you enjoy yourself and travel before you become a mum. You will only know what real love is when you have your first child and everything will fall into place. Take time to cuddle, play and laugh with your children when they are little because they grow so quickly.

 

– Eilidh Gallagher (@mummyandmonkeys)
Lavendon
Mummy and Monkeys

 

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